A Big LIE: Vulnerability is NOT Being Open

vulnerable naked

We live in a world with such thick facades, that often vulnerability is relinquished to late night TED talk viewing of Brené Brown as opposed to a public explanation and exploration of emotions.


When we get dumped, we post a photo of us out on the town (by ourselves).

When we get fired, we tweet about not being tied down (while waiting in line at unemployment).

When we fail an exam, we pin a pic about new doors opening (while eating ice cream in our bathroom).


But when we post that we had a tough day, we get unfriended.


So today, I hope you will take a leap of vulnerability with me.


I recently realized that the real key to vulnerability is not telling someone you fell when life gives you an unexpected bend, but allowing them to help you get up.


Yes, vulnerability is…

…not opening up to someone, but leaning on them.

…not asking for an ear, but asking for support.

…not posting for likes, but pleading for love.


That is tough.


[Story time.]


This summer I cried.


Not like a Susan Boyle YouTube video watch for the 50th time type good cry…but like a this-is-hard-type cry.


Do you know where I went?


To my grandma’s grave.




My dead grandmother is the only one whom I trusted enough to hear me cry. (This, by the way, is not saying anything about my friends, but about myself.)


But don’t we all do that?


Don’t we shy away from the real emotions lest we are perceived as being a downer or an emotional leech or maybe worse…needy [gasp]?!


And guess what?


It is okay to lean on someone. It is okay to admit you aren’t perfect. It is okay to just be you—even if you feel you aren’t quite strong enough to admit you are weak. For when you are weak, then you are strong (2Cor. 12:10).


Now for those brave almost ADD’d out souls who are still reading, a message: You are loved. You are cared about. You are known. There are those who WANT to support you—let them.


When words are too scary to say and trust is too fragile to give and hearts are too soft to share—it is at that moment that you are understood most.


And when you feel alone and don’t want to lean on someone, let that become a springboard to make you better. Push on that wall of fear so hard, with the help of your friends, family and God, that it is pushed over into a ramp to launch you up to the better version of you.


“For by the sadness of the countenance, the heart is made better” (Eccl. 7:3)





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