Once you actually are ready to go on a first date with a girl, how do you make sure it is good enough to score a second? How do you not be a player but still play the game?
Here are five steps for a first date to ensure a second:
STEP 1: Ask her on a date.
Use the word “date” and give her a time you will pick her up. Don’t be late, you idiot.
STEP 2: Plan to keep it under 2 hours–60-90 min is ideal.
A quick dinner OR frozen yogurt OR crepes OR cupcakes (note there was no “and” there). If they aren’t wanting more, you gave them too much. DO NOT ask her ‘what she is doing on Thursday,’ but it is appropriate to gauge her interest by saying, ‘We should do this again sometime.’ A PDT (post date text) is another telltale sign you did step three right.
STEP 3: ONLY talk 20% of the time.
THIS is the biggest biggest biggest mistake guys make. (MORE ON THIS BELOW)
STEP 4: Don’t contact her for at least 1 day.
It shows that you aren’t too eager and have “stuff” going on.
STEP 5: Call her to ask her on a second date.
Yes, call her–(no text/fbook/text/snap/insta tag/group me/linked in/email/pigeon/page/singing telegram…okay, maybe a singing telegram, but call her too) and ask her to do something specific in a call under 5 min. For example, “[small chat]..but hey, I wanted to call to see if I can take you to grab a bite to eat and to the nicklecade this week!”
If you follow these five steps and she says “No,” either she’s a troll or you are. If she is, good riddance (thank you, Google for letting me know it isn’t “good riddens”…that could have been embarrassing if people knew I had no idea how to even pronounce that right, much less spell it #closecall). She would make a terrible mother. If you are a troll…well…don’t know what to tell you, buddy. Shoot lower? But really though, you’re fine. Just keep trying. (The five steps don’t actually work for “any” girl, that was just to get you to click on this article.)
Okay…so why should you only talk 20% of the time?
First, everyone loves talking about themselves, so she will have a great time.
Second, you will appear slightly mysterious.
Third, and most importantly, the only reason you would want to go on a second date with her is because you like her. She doesn’t ask you on a second date; you ask her. And the only way that you are going to find out if you like her is by learning about her…which comes from, class? That’s right! HER talking, not you. So learn about her on the first date and and do talking 50-50 for the next two dates. (You will find that you will ease back into that 20% thing very involuntarily quickly if the relationship progresses.)
So you can charm your way onto a first date, trick a girl to a second date and maybe even convince a girl on a third date…but that’s when the game ends and you are just left with you. The common misunderstanding is that “the game” is meant to fool someone into falling for you–but it isn’t, it is to break down the initial walls to see if love is even there. These five steps help do just that.
So play on, because the game is over when love takes the field.