I had been going out with this girl for a few weeks and we were starting to get a little more serious—becoming more comfortable with each other. One Saturday we went on a pretty casual date to play sports, hit up the hot tub and then off to grab a bite.
By eating time, it was late. We were both tired and hungry.
About 15 min into the dinner I had a sudden rush of fear.
‘Oh no! She hasn’t laughed the entire time I’ve been sitting here! I’m a terrible date!’
And that is when it hit me.
‘No…’ I though, ‘I’m just comfortable.‘
See, I’ve realized recently that on so many of my dates, I’ve been lying.
And so have you.
We lie when we are going out to a dance party and having a blast when we really want to be home watching Netflix.
We lie when we open doors for women only for the first few dates.
We lie when we say that we aren’t picky about restaurants and then end up only liking one place.
We lie when we read intellectually stimulating books just to say that we did.
So let’s all just stop.
Too many guys have married a chill girl only to find out she was bat-tart crazy.
Too many girls have married a perfect guy only to discover he is a total creeper and abusive.
On the not so sever side, too many have dated a really fun person to find out they are super lame—a movie goer who hates movies—a partier who hates parties—a person who is only being what they think the other person wants.
Just be you.
Don’t stop trying…but be honest.
Because I promise, you are worth being loved and will be loved; but the problem is when people fall in love with what you want them to think you are.
You are worth it…all by yourself.
Yes, it’s okay to be tired and hungry and NOT funny.
It’s okay to have a bad day.
It’s okay to even be a little vulnerable.
You aren’t on some stage trying to entertain your date with a character portrayal of everything they want—you are sitting at dinner with someone who just wants to be with you.
So let’s try to improve ourselves, but be honest with who we are because there is no role in the act of love for liars.
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