It was the week before I met my fiancée—but for all I knew, I was going to be waiting another 10 years.
I felt discouraged, disheartened, and just plain tired.
“The day will come when you feel you have met your eternal mate.”
It was right there in my patriarchal blessing.
I read those four words over and over and over, “The day will come.”
I knew that my patriarchal blessing said that I would be married. I felt that the blessings which I had received were real when I was promised a spouse. I believed that if I was obedient, then everything would work out— at least in some kind of a the-Lord-knows-better-than-me type way.
But knowing about those blessings didn’t change the fact that loneliness had become my constant companion. I distracted myself with dates, and instead of isolation, I chose business as my solace.
I attempted to weary the Lord. I tried to play the dating game exactly right, I prayed, I fasted, I went to the temple. But despite going on over 1,000 dates, my attempts felt completely fruitless.
I felt like Sheri Dew when she said, “Believe me, if fasting and prayer and temple attendance automatically resulted in a [spouse], I’d have one” (“You Were Born to Lead, You Were Born for Glory,” BYU Speeches, Dec. 9, 2003).
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