It was late, and my wife and I were getting ready to go to sleep. I rolled over and looked at her.
“What?” she asked, smiling at me.
I asked her a simple question: “How do you know that I love you?”
Certainly, I thought, it is going to be the surprise cruise honeymoon that cost thousands. Or maybe the book of 100 reasons why I love her that took over 10 hours to make. Or maybe the rose petals I saved from our proposal and pressed for Valentine’s Day. Surely, one of those things is how she knows I love her.
Her response left me speechless.
“Because you brought me my water bottle.” I had completely forgotten that I had grabbed her water bottle on the way to bed and handed it to her. She usually keeps it on her nightstand, but it happened to be in the kitchen, so I just brought it in.
“And because you did the dishes.” But she had cooked . . . isn’t that normal if she cooks and I clean?
“And because you text me during work.” Doesn’t everyone?
“And because you give me kisses.” Isn’t that for me too?
To be honest, I was a little bugged at first. She had mentioned so many little things that I hadn’t even thought about that I felt like my grand gestures hadn’t been appreciated. But then I remembered something I had read when we were engaged: “Marriage isn’t any big thing, it’s a lot of little things. Acts of kindness every day create a happy marriage” (John Bytheway, What We Wish We’d Known When We Were Newlyweds).
It wasn’t until my wife answered her own simple question that the quote made sense. That’s when I stopped looking for one really big way to yell “I LOVE YOU!” and instead made a goal to find lots of little ways to say the same three words.
But this advice isn’t just about marriage—it’s about all relationships, even those in our business and personal lives. Studies have shown that…
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